Prometheus. A review. Seriously.

Prometheus is a hilarious comedy in the tradition of "Spaceballs" and "Men in Black" about a motley crew of forgetful, scaredy-cat scientists who go into space and try to find their alien creator. They find maps in caves that are their invitation, but this turns out to be a hilarious trick, like a mousetrap for retards. The first scene is a giant, german-looking albino steroid guy who drinks some coffee out of an ashtray and gets sick and falls in the waterfall. Special effects reveal that he has little, tiny ladders in his blood called D&A. This guy looks like a member of the Blue Man Group, except White. There is a UFO flying overhead that is never seen or mentioned ever again in the movie


I had to give a shout out for BEAST (2017 Written and directed by Michael Pearce, the film is both adventurous and occasionally masterful. While the screenplay isn’t outright exceptional, it has been realised by the director with assurance and finesse. The principle takeaway is surely the outstanding performance of Jessie Buckley as ‘Mol’. If Buckley doesn’t go far, something is awry: she is an exceptional acting talent who deserves all the recognition she is receiving for ‘Beast’ - and then some. I think she’s a near-future Oscar nod. Buckley is now filming ‘Misbehaviour’ with Suki Waterhouse, Keeley Hawes, Keira Knightley, under the dire


Every now and again a film breaks all the rules and gets away with it. By ‘film’, of course, I mean screenplay. Because a screenplay is a film shot in digital ink. Most of the good stuff and the bad stuff in films is because of good screenplays or bad screenplays. It’s just that the public don’t realise that. They know good stageplays make good plays, and that’s why they admire or abhor playwrights. That’s why Shakespeare is Shakespeare (sorry – I mean the 17th Earl of Oxford. Oops). Every now and again a film breaks all the rules and gets away with it. By ‘film’, of course, I mean THE FAVOURITE (Deborah Davis and Tony McNamara, 2019). The Favourite says, ‘See these rules of film making? Bye

Bad baddie cliches

'Hollywood’s obsession with hiding people’s imperfections borders on the ridiculous'’s-obsession-with-hiding-people’s-imperfections-borders-on-the-ridiculous/ar-BBRrIdW 'Borders'? The use of cliché to get the message across in high budget films is without borders. It's an insult to the film makers and the film audience. Not a 'Hollywood' film, per se, but I reference 'Skyfall' (2012), in which Bond's nemesis 'Silva (Javier Bardem) isn't just scarred: his face is part prosthetic - the result of an altercation when he was, wait for it, an MI6 agent, just like Bond. Seriously. Silva comes complete with dyed blond maniac hair, and demonic

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